Wednesday, March 11, 2020

The definition of a girlfriend and boyfriend relationship

A while ago, I told you that I never have a girlfriend and boyfriend relationship.  Also, not long ago, I mentioned that I had a few boyfriends.  Now, let me justify why I said so.

In year 2007 (I am not sure exactly which year was that), I met a Malaysian, Loong Jay Jee (https://www.instagram.com/jayjee.loong/) who are a graduate from United World College (https://www.uwcsea.edu.sg/).  He asked me to become his girlfriend.  I never think any further at that time and I said yes because I was thinking of being involved in a girlfriend and boyfriend relationship and not a marriage, I can always change my boyfriend if I am not happy about him.  He hold my hand once while we were walking towards the same direction.  After that, he said we must leave each other or a broke-up through a SMS after a few days.  I never cry and I am OK with that SMS because I don't think that I love him.  I did not know what is LOVE at that time with no emotion involved.  Is this a girlfriend and boyfriend relationship with only meeting once by holding hands once?  Loong Jay Jee is married now.

In year 2010 (I am not sure exactly which year was that), I met a Malaysian, Christopher Tock @ Spinzer (https://www.spinzer.us/about/) who are a graduate from Kolej Tunku Jaafar - KTJ (https://www.ktj.edu.my/).  He is married now with a newborn baby.  How I wish that he was my boyfriend and yet, the personality and the achievements of a graduate of KTJ and a dropped-out of KTJ make a big gap of significant differences.  I knew a KTJ dropped-out, he can't form a proper question, he did not know how to ask questions, he doesn't know what is polite acts, what can he do and what can't he do and he can't speak error-free English.  I thought he was a special/ disabled adult. 

In year 2013, ......             

I year 2015, I had an online boyfriend from United States of America.  He is an academician and he did sent me flowers.  Yet, he never propose a marriage to me and we broke-up.  We never meet face to face. 

In year 2016, ......

You know well!  You know how to differentiate between acquaintances, friendship and a relationship.  A relationship contains responsibilities and the sense of security.  For example:  the children and their parents are within a relationship.  The parents have the responsibilities to take care of their children and their children have the sense of security by having their parents around.  Example 2: the boyfriend must take care of his girlfriend because this is his responsibility.  And, the girlfriend must feel safe and having the sense of security when they are together.  The sense of security and responsibilities must come together.  Either of the items is missing is not a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship.             

Thus, in some sense that I have many boyfriends and yet, I do not have any boyfriend and girlfriend relationship at all.  In other words, I never have a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship which toward love or sex.  The boyfriend and girlfriend relationship must be long-lasting, having sense of security which is falling in love and being responsible to each other until the marriage stage.

Looking forward to have a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship soon.  I want a serious relationship between girl and boy.  I want to fall in love.   
 

No comments: